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This morning while shaving I caught my reflection in the mirror. Then I stood back and looked myself over. It’s pretty amazing for me to see myself and think “okay, I don’t need to lose or gain any weight, this is just fine.”
For most of this year and last, I actually kept a shirt on while shaving, and at all times avoided my reflection in the mirror. I wore baggy clothes and multiple layers so that hardly anyone could tell that I’d put on a lot of weight. But in my heart, I knew.
So being back to where I want to be, seeing myself in great physical condition, I should be totally stoked, right? This alone, should be motivation enough so that I won’t ever go back to overeating again, right?
My experience over the past 11 years is that as much as I really love to feel and look great in my own skin, that just doesn’t do the trick. It’s an important part of what motivates me, but it can’t be the only thing.The temptation and/or urge to eat is much stronger than a fleeting feeling of comfort in my appearance.
It seems like I need to have a whole lot of resources to draw upon as I undertake a long-run approach to being a healthy eater. Some days, sure, it could be that my clothes fit great. It could be a feeling I have when I’m running. Or maybe it can be a run-down through my food journal, that gives me a sense of satisfaction from having kept it up. It can even be the sense of relief I get when I’m able to pass a pastry case without even wanting to get something.
Last night as I was eating dinner, however, I wolfed the food down so fast I hardly tasted it. When I catch myself doing this, I know it’s a warning signal. So another thing that keeps me on the right path is acknowledging the food I’m eating and making sure that I really love it.
Trust me, I’m not knocking how valuable it is for me to be non-critical about my body. But it takes more than a mirror to make a body look good.